Lines Must Be Drawn

Madness.

Sheer Madness.

I'll admit don't love going to a gym (although I have, over time, come to love my gym). I probably wouldn't go if I didn't have to. But. THIS IS RIDICULOUS (just look at the video!).

Eat less. Move more. It's really just that simple. When you're working, work. When you're eating, eat. When you're working out, work out. And then be done with it.

Don't buy the stupid treaddesk.

via Popgadget

The Difficulties of Working from Home

Our neighbor across the hall has a dog, some type of poodle-y thing. Her name is Joey (the dog) and she's awfully sweet. And surprisingly not too yappy for a small dog. Although the poor dog does suffer from anxiety, according to her owner. Dog anxiety. Which causes her to FLIP THE FUCK OUT sometimes during the day when there is an unusual level of stirring in the apartment.

Well, this week our neighbor has visitors. Visitors with children! Which makes today one of those days, and unfortunately, I've had a lot of recording to do.

I am writing to you from a little ramshackle pillow and blanket fort I've constructed in the bedroom. Will just lambasted me over IM about how, when we first moved here, I laughed at him when he offered to make me a secret recording room in the office closet.

As I recall, I loved the idea until he mentioned that we could cordon it off with a beaded curtain. That's when I started laughing.

Now, I'll take any sort of foamy sound proofing attached to any tiny space as long as I can lock myself away from the cries of Poodle Anxiety.

Bootcamp: New Sneakers Changed My Life (and Fuck You, MTA)

Don't anyone tell Ruben, but having my sneaker thrown into the murky drink was the best thing that ever happened to me. My new sneakers put a spring in my step I never would have imagined possible.

In other news, I can't find shoes to wear to this wedding this weekend and it took me over an hour to get home from Union Square. Love that the MTA is going to raise the subway fair for the third time in like two years. Garrrgh!

(I'm going to go wash that grump away with a quick shower. Have a great weekend, everyone. I'll be in Vermont, possibly barefoot.)

I Tried, Local Coffeeshop.

Dear Coffee Shop Closest to my Apartment:

I can't go on like this anymore. I tried to rekindle our relationship. I felt like I was holding up my end of the bargain. I came back to you, I ordered coffee, I drank it, I did my work. I looked the other way when you had your Mommy & Me moments. I burrowed my head into my notebook when bratty kids pitched fits, I put headphones in when the chatty Cathies got chatty.

But today, CSCtmA, today you found the camel-back-breaking straw. When you allow your employees not only to listen to awful pop music but to sing along in lieu of collecting my money or getting my coffee, that seals the deal.

I just cannot be in a relationship with the Hot 97 of coffee shops. I'll even settle for the coffee shop on fire.

Best of luck to you.

Tree Trucks to the Left of Me, Chainsaws to the Right

I have a few bits of recording to do today before I jet out of the apartment and I'm being perfectly THWARTED by lawn care professionals!

My desk sits next to a window that faces the street. This is lovely for things like light and air, but terrible for sound-proofing needs. Every time I've plugged my mic in this morning, a "Tree Service" Truck starts raising holy hell out on the street below.

I thought I might move my operation out into the living room, but the windows (open or closed) can't protect me from the fellow who was inspired to do some of his own tree-removal or branch gouging this morning. There is an actual chainsaw ripping through the sound barrier in the back yard.

Now the tree truck and the chainsaw could all be part of the same team, but either way, I'm at a loss. I know these guys are working, but so am I! (well, at least I'm trying) And the biggest snag is that there is nothing I can do about it but wait them out.

You'd really have to be a big idiot to confront a dude with a chainsaw for making too much noise.

When we first moved into this apartment, Will had the bright idea to turn the closet in the office into a small recording studio for me. I scoffed, partly because I thought it would be silly to sit in a closet and partly because he mentioned taking the doors off and replacing them with some type of beaded curtain. But now, I think it's time to take him up on that one!

Where Have All the Ad Men Gone?

Will and I bought plane tickets this morning for an upcoming wedding, and this is what we got in our confirmation email:

Really? That's what they're calling it? The airlines desperately need some better Ad Men.

Is it Sad, or Am I Just Intolerant?

I've learned something today.

I'm writing from the coffee shop that sits about half a block from my house. Yesterday I spent some time at the coffee shop about 3 blocks away, but today I thought I'd stick closer to home.

But there's a problem.

I live closer to the annoying coffee shop.

Seriously. At about 11am it becomes the meeting point for the new mommy club.

It's not the fact that the babies cry and make noise and are otherwise distracting. It's the mommies.

I just had to sit and bite my tongue while frantically searching for my headphones as one mommy told the other that she was still undecided as to whether or not little Matilda would be vaccinated because she wasn't finished researching their safety.

Now the other mommy has started walking around the coffee shop to bounce her baby. But she's still staying in conversation with the mommies at the table. Because, you know, it's a small place and what's a little more volume? It's not like anyone else has anything better to do than make sure her baby is comfortable and her social needs are met.

This isn't to say that I don't think they should be here. When I was a nanny, I took the baby out for lunch (me- a sandwich, Lulu- a bottle), and it was nice to be able to be mobile with her.

BUT.

The key to getting out of your house is the fact that you are no longer In Your House. It's not ok to go into another room and shout to complete the story you started before you left. And please, Jesus, it's not cool to take your shoes off at the table. And since when is it ok to change a diaper at a table in a restaurant?! Good god, isn't anything sacred???!!!?

I guess if I want a cooler coffee shop, I'm gonna have to suck it up and walk the extra few blocks. There goes the neighborhood!